Being a poledancer's hubby is not an easy duty. You might facing many unexpected challenges during the way. By Andi Tamás.
Boyfriends. I'll use this one term collectively for boyfriends, husbands, partners, etc for laziness reasons. Far be it from me to discriminate but I’m a heterosexual female who has a male human attached. (Not complaining.) As such, this is my specific point of view.
So yeah, poledancing boyfriends. I mean the boyfriends of poledancers. (I am so going deep into the forest of being too gender specific that I am not even going to apologize, just deal with it.)
There are many points that can be picked apart, and the picking to pieces is different depending on what you have between your legs and/or what relation do you have to the poledancer in question. Right now, I am addressing the pole dancing ladies, but gents, do read on for the sole purpose of enjoying my madly amusing style.
Ladies, the way a dude reacts to you pole dancing can vary on a scale from utter disgust to being elected his number one masturbatory fantasy. Get used to it. I had all kinds of reactions from men, nothing surprises me any more, not to mention the amount (precisely zero) fucks I give about what they think.
But I admit I like the attention.
First and foremost, you do pole for you. As for the reactions of males, specifically males of the boyfriend species, you handle each according to your personal preference or the level of your hunger. Do let them know that they should not fuck with you when you’re hungry... or otherwise, because muscles.
Here are a few reactions you may encounter from your / your potential mates.
1. You start pole dancing while you’re already dating him. Sure he’s supportive, thinks it’s cool and may even brag to his friends, but he never asks to see you actually do pole.
2. You pole dance and meet someone new and after a while you casually mention that your sport of choice is pole fitness. He might
- act like he is not even familiar with the concept of balls and will try to explain to you how all this is slutty or strippery or objectifying or some other nonsense.
- give you his most dashingly condescending smile and inform you that this is not even a real sport and if this is the case he will surely fit a “sweetcheeks” or a “babycakes” into his monologue.
If I was in such a situation, I personally would skip the Whattheactualfuckisyourproblem question and just walk. Nooooot even looking back.
Now let’s assume that you found a guy with a brain and some balls. Once you made sure he appreciates you, feel free to lure him into the depth of your obsession with pole dancing.
Make him try it. Get him out of his comfort zone, give the both of you a good laugh and feel free to hate him if he is good at it because mother nature was anything but fair when it came to distributing muscular strength between genders in general. My boyfriend is the type who is okay with trying and because he's fit, he can hold certain poses he never tried before for an infuriatingly long time. Unfairness to the moon and beyond. But I digress.
Okay, so you have a boyfriend that appreciates YOU (most important), what you do and even participates in the fun because you intimidated him into it. Good job. Now engage him in the art of pole photography. If you’re dating a photographer, you’re lucky. Otherwise, he will have to learn that apart from the regular obligations of a boyfriend, such as providing comfy hoodies and reaching the top shelf, he has been promoted to the honorific position of pole photographer. Teach him the most important things and be patient with him. And after he has taken the umphundredth picture of the same pose, give him a break and maybe a drink. Being a caring boyfriend is a hard enough job as it is, let alone a caring boyfriend to a pole dancer. ;)
Author: Andi Tamás